ooh it's all so quiet in the little wooden, cold, damp house while one sleeps
(which is a miracle given the barking cough she has) and the other two are out getting their 'unidentified meat in a roll' fix at the super size me hardware factory.
Life has been it's usual roller coaster. To a backdrop of rain we have endured rounds of sickness and sick related symptoms that have left me feeling that providing endless care and sympathy to the little needy, snotty and downright difficult people in this house is a tough gig, and had me dreaming of places, lives, holes in the ground I would rather be - something I am not proud of - and makes me feel even worse about my situation - but (after a stiff drink or three) I honestly think is only a human reaction - isn't it ?
I never thought caring and nurturing and stroking foreheads would take so much out of me and leave me feeling, at times (usually about 5 pm) so hard done by.
The mantra from older and seemingly wiser mothers is that the immune systems will be tough as nails by the time they get to school - which is just as well really, because at this rate they will need to be healthy to take care of their mother who will be rocking back and forth in the corner ....drooling.
I hear you. I am feeling awfully sorry for myself of late too. At the moment, and for the last couple of weeks I realised I have not been enjoying motherhood. Sleep deprivation, being stuck inside all day because it's cold and wet, two poorly little people, coughing and sneezing and needing a lot of consoling. Always by mummy. Are we supposed to enjoy it, motherhood, is that too much to ask? If we knew beforehand what we were signing up for, would we still sign away? I asked my husband and he said yes of course... I don't know. Ask me again in a couple of weeks/months/years however long it takes for us to be over our recurring illnesses and we all get more than one good nights sleep in a row.You know what really freaks me out, is that my situation is so ordinary. Other families have children who are really actually always sick, or have husbands who are away or mothers who never get a break, and don't get me started on the families we see in the news. So do I really have the right to complain? I hope that in twenty years time my kids can say, look mum we turned out OK and i'll look back and wonder what I was so stressed about.
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